Ladies, listen up. As a man, I’m here to tell you something very, very important – you’re beautiful! I don’t care what you’re wearing right now, or what you wore last night, or how much you weigh, or how tall or short you are, or any of that superficial nonsense; beauty lies from within and as cliché as that sounds, it’s the damn truth.
Over the last few years, hip-hop has failed in explaining that very concept to our young girls, the truth that you’re all beautiful. Instead, the most popular female celebrities, specifically musicians, have put such an emphasis on their looks and twerking ability rather than their personalities, and it’s becoming detrimental to our society. From ass shots to plastic surgery to changing the color of your eyes permanently, women in the spotlight of fame (reality tv or otherwise) are sending a very negative message to the 12, 13 and 14-year old girls who idolize them.
Don’t you think it’s time to change all that?
The easy way out would be to blame the parents for allowing their daughters to pay attention to “Anaconda” or TMZ, and in turn adopting these harmful mentalities. But let’s be honest: unless you lock your daughter in her room her whole life, she’s going to be exposed to the seductiveness of pop culture whether you like it or not. Even if she doesn’t have an iPhone or iPad or her own computer, chances are her best friend does and they’re most likely talking about how hot Rihanna looked on the cover of Esquire UK the other day, instead of the women empowerment movements that are happening everyday. It’s just the way things are these days.
Now, before the Barbz and the #RihannaNavy start yelling at me, I’m not insinuating that our female celebrities are ONLY harming our youth, because that’s absurd. Rihanna and Nicki, in particular, have created timeless music that has helped countless young girls cope with many issues, and without sounding too dramatic, they’ve more than likely saved several young girls’ lives without even knowing it. Instead of bashing the celebrities and telling them how they should act from here on out, I’m simply proposing that it would be more successful and we’d have a bigger impact if we took the time to explain to these young girls that they can be beautiful no matter how they look. And c’mon, most of these celebs’ photo are airbrushed. None of them woke up like that.
To the young girls out there, if you’re worried about finding love and you think to yourself, “guys only want a girl with a big butt and a pretty face,” please think again. Those “guys” you’re referring to are immature, naïve and will eventually be left alone when they realize there’s no future with a big booty girl who has an awful personality. Real men are looking for a woman to be the mother to their child and someone that they can hold a legitimate conversation with at all times-a life partner and best friend, not the Kim Kardashian look-a-likes who can’t tell me the difference between there, their and they’re.
Are looks important? They certainly are. I’m not going to sit here and act like they’re not. But think of it like a book or an album: if the cover “looks good,” we’ll be interested. We’ll open up the book or play the CD and be intrigued about what’s to come. If the book is appealing or the CD sounds good, then we’ll keep reading or listening, the same way we would keep engaging an interesting girl. As soon as the book turns left, or the CD starts to not sound good, we’ll leave the book and the CD behind, just like we would leave a personality-less girl in the dust, regardless of how great that cover or her outfit looked. That’s how men operate.
If you’re thinking, “Jason, you’re wrong. I’ve been with tons of guys and all they care about is looks,” then I’m here to tell you one very simple thing – they’re not men, they’re boys. In order to find Mr. Right, you need to be independent, sweet, caring, ambitious and nice. If you do all that, and have respect for yourself in the process, I guarantee you your dream man will be knocking on your door any day now.
Written by: Jason Holzman